Final note to say is to say that the comedy in this book will have you laughing at things you thought were morally wrong to laugh at, but here you are belly laughing at suicidal jokes. Life is just so exhausting, he says, that there is not a moment when he is unaware of himself. Has he never felt inner calm? Actually, yes, there was one day, recently. When Tracini was finally diagnosed with BPD in his late 20s, it was life-changing. “I felt such relief knowing that what I had was a thing, because my immediate thought process on it was: if it’s a thing, you can fix a thing. I thought I was beyond repair. I thought that I was utterly done for ever.” He was told that long-term, regular therapy might make it slightly better. It was good enough for him. It gave him hope. WATCH DAMIAN'S POP UP PANTO ON DEMAND FROM WED 23 DECEMBER". Sheffield Theatres . Retrieved 31 December 2020.

Review: Crawley panto Cinderella is a Christmas treat not to be missed". Crawley News. 14 December 2009 . Retrieved 17 April 2015. Tracini, the son of the popular entertainer Joe Pasquale, was a child prodigy. In 2003, he was the British junior magical champion and was named the most promising comedy act by Ken Dodd. He was only 15 years old; endless opportunities lay ahead. He attended the Italia Conti Academy of Theatre Arts in London and learned how to sing, dance and act, before starring on TV in My Spy Family, Coming of Age and Hollyoaks. But, for a long while, drugs, alcohol, BPD and despair got the better of him.In one video, Tracini sings a song about the erectile dysfunction caused by his BPD; in another, he wears a snorkel and a thong to protect himself from Covid-19; elsewhere, he chats to Miriam Margolyes while she is chomping on a raw onion to ensure he keeps his social distance. Tracini is fascinated with language and wordplay. Why are bees’ knees so special, he asks; he has never even seen a pair. On another occasion, he breaks down the word hopeless – it does not mean he has no hope, just that he has less hope than others. At one point, he says he always feels empty – as hollow as a chocolate Father Christmas. Obrigada Joe. Foi uma experiência incrível e eu vou sentir falta das suas palavras nas noites de insônia. His television career started in 2004 when he was a guest on CITV STEM show Prove It!. He fully made his television debut in 2007 as Spike Bannon in My Spy Family airing on Boomerang. Following the success of the first series, he would go on to reprise his role in both the second and third series before the show eventually ended in January 2010. In 2007, Tracini was also cast in the role of Darren 'DK' Karrimore in a pilot for the new BBC Three situation comedy Coming of Age. The first series, airing in 2008 was well received enjoying an average weekly reach of 1.2 million. Subsequent second and third series followed, where Tracini continued to gain plaudits for his outlandish performances, however in 2011 the decision was made to axe the show. [23] In 2010, Tracini also played the role of Victor in the single series of the BBC Four comedy The Great Outdoors. A truly extraordinary book. Brave, beautiful and brilliant. Heartbreaking, harrowing and frequently hilarious. Joe Tracini travels to the horrible heart of his abominable illness and unflinchingly examines the misery it has heaped upon him and everyone around him. Incredibly, he emerges from the darkness with a timeless tale of love, hope and redemption that will be of immeasurable help to people facing the most destructive demons and, crucially, everyone who loves them. Please read this book. It will make the world a better place.' - James O'Brien

Tear family away from the screen for Peter Pan treat". getwestlondon.co.uk. 16 December 2008 . Retrieved 17 April 2015. Coming of Age', 'How Not To Live' axed by BBC Three". Digital Spy. 27 May 2011 . Retrieved 17 April 2015. My adult career has been trying to undo everything I taught myself about how to be like my dad’ ... Tracini as Dennis Savage in Hollyoaks. Photograph: Channel 4 Despite having four sisters (three from his father’s first marriage), he did not much engage with other children or childhood. “I was a real novelty, because I spoke and thought like an adult. I wrote my own stuff and would do five to 10 minutes at the end of my dad’s act when I was seven years old.” He adored his father and wanted to be his double. “I’ve got hundreds of hours of me on film. And it is essentially me, this tiny little boy, being my dad.” Writing this book has been the hardest thing I've ever done. It had to be dragged into the world, with my condition telling me that every single word, sentence and chapter was terrible and would make strangers walk up to me in the street and punch me in the face.Tracini can’t stand most of what is said in the media about mental health – he says so much of it is po-faced or exploited by celebrities to promote a product. “I used to be watching, thinking: ‘Yeah, great, when’s your album out?’” So many mental health narratives are sugar-coated, he says. “It’s empty and fluffy, like: it will get better. I’m a lot of things, but I’m not fluffy and what goes on up there isn’t fluffy. It’s not a nice little gif with a hug.” However, the interview caused a divide between viewers, with one saying: "Get him off, this is causing me anxiety. #lorraine" Read More Related Articles

Tracini is developing a BPD standup routine, which he hopes to take on the road. “It’s called Ten Things That I Hate About Me. It’s basically a Ted Talk gone wrong,” he says. Joe Tracini To Star In Spamalot Tour Alongside His Father Joe Pasquale From May 11!". Broadway World. 15 April 2015 . Retrieved 17 April 2015. Despite his poor mental health, Tracini has had a stable professional life – he has rarely been without work. He left Hollyoaks in 2014 after a three-year stint, thinking he would go on to something bigger and better. But there was nothing bigger than trying to quell the voices in his head. He briefly returned to Hollyoaks in 2018, after his diagnosis, but acting gigs were increasingly hard to come by. Since 2017, he has presented the children’s TV show The Dengineers (“Basically Grand Designs for kids”) with Meryl Fernandes. In December, it won a Children’s Bafta for best factual entertainment show. I managed to get my hands on this book 4 days early and devoured the whole thing in a day. I’ll start by saying that this book is a very heavy read, and as Joe points out, if you’re not ready to read this book or easily triggered then please don’t read it.

Customer reviews

But I had run out of options. I’d done everything I ‘d been told to do and I still thought about killing myself every day. So I wrote this book to save my life.

This a searingly honest must read. Joe has wisdom, kindness and a deep understanding of mental health issues. He is also hilarious with a delicious sense of humour. His book will save lives and I cannot recommend it highly enough.' - Lorraine Kelly

This book is incredibly honest, and I know it cannot have been easy to write. But it is so beneficial and I know that this book will save many people's lives. The book is a real rollercoaster ride of emotions, echoing the life of Tracini himself. But I had run out of options. I'd done everything I 'd been told to do and I still thought about killing myself every day. So I wrote this book to save my life. You have to buy this book. I mean it. It's very funny and sad and utterly true. It's a life-saver. And Joe Tracini is a magician. He wins in the end. And so will you.' - Miriam Margolyes Joe Anderton (14 May 2019). "Hollyoaks' Joe Tracini opens up about mental health struggles". Digital Spy . Retrieved 14 May 2019. Former Hollyoaks star Joe Tracini joins father Joe Pasquale in Spamalot". Digital Spy. 15 April 2015 . Retrieved 17 April 2015.