The stories of four Asian American mother-daughter pairs marred by unspeakable trauma, struggling to express hope and love in translation, became a global phenomenon within the Asian community and beyond. The brilliance of The School for Good Mothers is in identifying these anxieties, and then ratcheting them up to reveal their absurdity. Even if other symptoms are listed in the pamphlets, they usually only emphasize the depression part.

For a traditional Asian person, what we think of as "alternative" is actually traditional and has been a part of their culture for centuries. Our Missing Hearts showed me the mom I need to be—necessarily political, fiercely truthful, fearless to act.It was not until I came across Postpartum Progress that I was able to “diagnose” myself with postpartum depression because I learned about intrusive thoughts and postpartum anxiety. Thank you so much for sharing your experience and a look at PPD from your cultural perspective, I learned a wealth of information and gained an understanding I didn't have before. I found it quite helpful – I am an Anglo-Australian, but my husband is Asian-Australian (Chinese-Singaporean ethnicity). At the same time, I was stressed because my mom seemed to be watching my every move, not giving me space to learn to be a mother on my own. Even though this was not my cultural norm, there were things about confinement that were definitely helpful, especially having someone else look after all the meals and cleaning!

However, we still face many difficulties in our industry because of our commitment to accessible and informational Asian news coverage. A story where Asian women aren’t portrayed as quiet or submissive, but as the complex people they are: fierce and flawed, strong and vulnerable, hurting and hurt. Like so many, I’d watched the world fall to pieces, first over the pandemic, and then again as the number of anti-Asian hate crimes skyrocketed. When I was pregnant with my first child, I received all the standard prenatal care: frequent OB visits, lab tests, and ultrasounds. Suddenly, my grandmother’s stories weren’t foreign or strange, but rooted in a shared Asian suffering; my mother’s fixation on success, her way of protecting us from a world that saw first the color of our skin.The things your MIL said about taking care of the baby make me chuckle because my mom is exactly the same way! I pushed through and “got better” on my own over the course of about half a year, even though I still had semi-frequent panic attacks and nightmarish thoughts about someone harming me or my baby even two years after I gave birth. Before I had my second child, my mom also told me “not to cry as much” because it was bad for my eyes (due to the tears affecting my hot/cold balance). Although our different cultures have rarely been much of an issue between us, it has been very interesting seeing the cultural differences, particularly with his parents, when we had children. Brandi – I agree that culture or background can be defined so much broader than just race or what country you come from.

But to the outside world I was fine because I couldn’t let the emotions our, or show people that I was struggling. Also, I completely know what you mean about the Asian culture being open to "alternative medicines" but skeptical about modern medicine. A Memoir in Nine Adventures , Jane Wong’s Meet Me Tonight in Atlantic City, and Delia Cai’s Central Places ; in film, there are rumblings of sequels to The Joy Luck Club and Crazy Rich Asians. Had I known that PPD symptoms included anger, among other things, then I might have been able to catch it sooner.In hindsight, I was depressed during the last part of my pregnancy but didn't really acknowledge it. As the growing pressure to be beautiful gets even heavier in Asia, is it right to pin these expectations onto mothers as well? Because I was finally having an honest conversation about motherhood—sharing traumatic birth stories, empathizing about the challenges of breastfeeding. I was grateful that I didn’t have to be alone with the baby, that I didn’t have to cook for myself, that she was always willing to rock the baby to sleep when I was too tired to do so anymore.