Emails from a Ninja: My Japanese father-in-law’s secret life

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Because they are comprised of the same characters, you might think that oyaji (親父 / おやじ) is the same as chichi-oya, but reversed. Oyaji means one’s father, but it is more colloquial-sounding. It can also refer to middle-aged or elderly men. Below is a list of Japanese vocabulary for someone else’s family members. A lot of these terms end with an honorific suffix さん ( -san) to emphasize respect and politeness toward others. Sons and daughters in laws show reverence towards their fathers – in–laws by displaying proper courtesy, using honorific titles when referring to them, following their instructions without questioning it. They should also support him financially if necessary by working together as one family unit without creating any discord among themselves or with other members of their community or society at large. What happens if a son or daughter–in–law does not follow through with their duties as a good married person according to the customs practiced by his/her Japanese father–in–law?

Traditionally it is expected that sons–and–daughters–in law pay for meals when dining with their fathers−and−mothers−in−law. Other expenses may be split or alternatively one person may pay entirely at their discretion. Are women expected to take their husband’s surname after marriage? As the ringleader ofthe oldestsocial conflict in modern Japanese history,however, my father-in-law had become something of a mythical figure himself. Until poor health forced him to stop, aged 94, he was in heavy demand around the country as an ‘agitator’ or speaker at protests against war, militarism and US bases. Despite his great charm, he was surrounded by a group of questionable acolytes. After years of guerrilla-style violence against the authorities, the left in Japan famously turned on itself in the 1970s and 80s and dissolved into internecine warfare. About 100 activists were killed indeadly sectarian disputescalled uchigeba. My father-in-law told me that one day, when he was riding the Shinkansen bullet train, a group of activists froma splinter sect, tried to kidnap him. “That would have been the end,” he said, laughing bitterly. But Chukaku-ha was also notorious for beating and intimidating members of other schisms, which of course alienated anyone not familiar with the obscure doctrinal differences that separated them.

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Perspectives: Adoption in Japan". Adoptive Families Association of BC. 2015-08-10 . Retrieved 2020-11-21. As you may have noticed, chichi consists of only the kanji for father (父), missing any polite or honorific markers unlike otousan, which makes this a humble term. The word ue (上 / うえ) means ‘above’ or ‘up’, and when added to chichi signifies honor or respect for one’s father. This was originally used in households of the samurai or nobility before the Meiji restoration.

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