My Dad's Jokes are Punny, So Color Him Funny!: 101 hilarious cartoons

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What’s the difference between a Catholic priest and a zit? A zit will wait until you’re twelve before it comes on your face. And God said to John, "Come forth and you shall be granted eternal life." But John came fifth and won a toaster. Complicated and long jokes can be a pain to remember, that is why I do prefer short jokes or even 2 line jokes like the following ones. Wanna REALLY funny jokes to tell your family (children included) that they will love? Well, here are the ones my family laughed most at. Looking for Seriously funny jokes? Let’s send the children to play so the real fun can start. These might be dirty funny jokes that you can only share with other adults, but they will laugh so hard that they will cry.

Santa Claus – or Father Christmas, Père Noël, Kris Kringle, Weihnachtsmann, Babbo Natale or whatever you prefer to call him – works very hard over December. In the run up to December 25, he’s constantly keeping an eye on his elves’ gift production line, drawing up plans for the most efficient route across the world and making sure his reindeer are in peak physical condition for their shift on Christmas Eve. What does one saggy b**b say to the other saggy b**b? If we don’t get some support, people will think we’re nuts.Never criticize someone until you have walked a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you'll be a mile away, and you'll have their shoes. I took the shell off of my racing snail, thinking it would make him faster. But if anything, it made him more sluggish. READ THIS NEXT: 183 Jokes for Kids That Provide Good, Clean Fun. 101 Clean Jokes for the Nice and Wholesome But there are some jokes that you do not have to be a professional to understand, like this very funny jokes. Every time I told them people laugh, no matter age or condition. If the family's sitting around the table for Sunday night dinner, go with something sure to go over well with the kids and adults in attendance like "What did the hamburgers name their baby?" We'd tell you the answer, but don't want to give all the good ones away just yet.

I would like to know what hurricane said to the coconut palm tree. Watch out, this is not an ordinary blow job! When you have some teenagers at home, you have to pay attention of what kind of jokes you tell. I do remember being a child and not understanding my grandma’s jokes. Then, as a teenager, I always got embarrassed hearing them telling them (and pretending I did not understood them). Even though I admit, then I could explain them to my school mates and I was the queen! At some point, you start also laughing with the adults in the room.

How to Tell a Long Joke?

A guy goes to the store to buy condoms… “Do you have a bag?”, the cashier inquired. “No,” the man replied, “she’s not really all that ugly.” A bear walks into a restaurant. He tells his waiter, "I want a grilled… cheese." The waiter says, "What's with the pause?" "Whaddya mean?" the bear replies. "I'm a bear!" Have you heard about Murphy's Law? Yes. Anything that can go wrong will go wrong. How about Cole's Law? No. It's julienned cabbage in a creamy dressing. What is the resemblance between a green apple and a red apple? They're both red except for the green one.