Naked Babies

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There are a number of reasons you might want to be naked in front of your kids — and an equal number of reasons you might choose a modicum of modesty. Regardless, it boils down to this: Listen to your kids, even when they’re not explicitly verbalizing something.

If you’re very clear what the boundaries are, then that child has no question whatsoever,” she explains, adding that kids don’t have the cognitive ability to understand nuance. “It is never OK to see an adult man naked — that is clear for that child.” Both Huebner and Bartell agree that you need to start paying attention to this issue as early as age 5 but that it’s generally a good idea to set some boundaries by 10, at the latest. Even the most private of private parts serve a biological function and shouldn’t come with feelings of shame attached to them. This can particularly help as children hit puberty. For your baby (especially after the dark coziness of the womb) the world is a wild place. She must learn about her body and how to function amidst different lights, sounds, smells, tastes, temperatures, and textures. As adults, we move through this stimulating world barely noticing these things (unless of course we’re at Disney World). In short, we are sensitized. While Bartell believes it’s always OK for children to be naked around their same-sex parents, she says a different dynamic eventually develops with mothers/sons and fathers/daughters. Pro: You can teach the difference between nudity and sexualityThe reality”, says Dr. Andrea Hayward, pediatric physical therapist, “is that giving babies opportunities to experience diaper-free moments can enhance the experience of walking, but they still have to figure out how to do it with diapers on.”

While some parents may choose to start covering up when that happens — especially when the child in question isn’t the same sex as you — you can also use this as a teaching moment and defuse the situation with a matter-of-fact, anatomically correct comment.Just remember never to make them feel bad for asking a question, no matter how mortifying it may be. Pro: You can promote body positivity and acceptance And Huebner says parental nudity can certainly achieve that goal: “Casual nudity in front of small children helps them learn to be accepting of bodies — to see that bodies are functional, strong, and normal, regardless of shape or size. As long as nudity is separated from sexuality, there is no disadvantage to a parent being naked around a young child.” Con: You just might feel uncomfortable On the flip side, you also need to respect your children when they no longer want to be naked in front of you. Haley, for example, feels very differently about her husband’s nudity, and he’s never been fully undressed in front of their daughter.

I think it’s important that she grows up seeing what normal actually is. Equally important, I want her to grow up seeing her mom being OK with what normal is.” Letting babies discover their bodies and environment through their bare skin supports sensory integration —the ability to understand the information we take in through our senses. The bottom line: There isn’t a one-size-fits-all answer to parental nudity, but whatever you decide will involve some degree of boundary setting. Whenever it’s warm and safe to do so, consider stripping your baby down to her diaper. If you’re brave you can take that off, too (more on this below). Being naked promotes different areas of her development, including: I’ve been very open with my daughter, and it helped open the door for questions she might have about her developing body,” says Sue from Massachusetts.Bartell suggests simply wearing underwear when in front of your kids, or even getting the message across by wearing a bathing suit without a big T-shirt over it: “Then your child can still see you’re embracing your body.” Nudity between parents and children is fine as long as both are fully comfortable,” says parent coach Dawn Huebner, PhD, author of the self-help book for kids “What to Do When You Worry Too Much.” Even physically modest parents can destigmatize nudity by not rushing to cover up if their child inadvertently sees them,” says Huebner. “Instead, calmly say something along the lines of ‘I prefer to be alone when I am using the bathroom’ or ‘I’ll talk to you when I am dressed,’ without making a big deal out of the encounter.”